Wednesday 29 October 2008

Braving the West End - again

After the disaster that was the Man behind the Iron Mask, I'm back on the road to redemption, and I'm confident that I would have made it all the way to salvation if Rob Lowe had not drenched me in spittle (Mrs B got very jealous of my 'Rob gob' experience). I had managed to secure front row tickets (aside 1) for "A Few Good Men" which is the best play that I have ever seen (not counting Mrs B playing a goat(aside 2), or when she got praised for her excellent Welsh accent whilst performing as a Liverpool bus conductress. Her heart went out of acting at this point , which was the Tadworth Local Amateur Dramatic & Local Luvies Society's and, I truly believe, the world's loss).

Rob Lowe in the Tom Cruise part was excellent, but could have played the roll a little dryer for my taste. Even Karen Macdonald (Steve's ex Mrs from Coronation Street) produced a fine performance, equal to Demi Moore herself (without having to resort to hanging around with people half her age, although If Keira Knightley wishes to hang around with people twice her age, there will be no complaints from me, I am after all still attempting to find, and possibly fight, my Mid Life Crises), while the male prison guard out of "Bad Girls" did a very creditable Jack Nicholson impression. An excellent evening all round, despite being mugged in broad daylight by an NCP car park, I thought I was renting a space, not purchasing the whole damned place.

I had also hoped to bring you a report from the ICE bar in London (aside 3), but I was not up to two muggings in one day, £12 to get in with a maximum stay of 45 mins (aside 5) so we went to the Apple store instead. What an experience that was, hundreds of homeless twenty year old somethings wondering aimlessly round the place with their lap tops and ipods, fantastic. Now here's an idea, stop wasting all your money on electrical goods and alcohol and start saving for a deposit for a home.

-----Tune in next week for more BlackLOG Historical---

There is a "so to speak" live BlackLOG available, which gives a more current picture of events in the Black household.....
































(1)The jury is out on front row seats at the Theatre. On the one hand, you are right in the thick of it, facial expressions, tears, sweat and spittle (I have been assured by an amdram type (not Mrs B, I might add) that if you don't produce spittle while speaking on stage you ain't getting the diction right) can all be clearly seen, heard and unfortunately felt. Theatres could go a long way to improving the plight of their front row guests if they provided towels and waterproofs. I certainly would not attempt seats in the front row of any really energetic musicals, well not without a bar of soap and a rubber ducky.(Return to text)
Mrs B was amazed that when ever she was in the front row, no matter how much she drank, the jug never seemed to empty....










































(2) I believe it was a draw, but Mrs B went down 4:1 in the replay. You don't often get second chances against goats, uncompromising little devils when they want to be... (Return to text)
Not exactly goats, unfortunatly I don't have any picures of goats so these will have to do












































(3) I can't help but think the owners have missed a trick, from what I have heard all you get is plain ice walls, they should have taken a leaf out of the Hard Rock Cafes books, but instead of having rock memorabilia on the walls they could have had frozen celebrities (aside 4) actually in them. Now that would be cool. (Return to text)

Mrs B tries out for the Icewall....























































(4) No, not just any old celebrity that they happen to come across. I'm talking about the ones who have signed up for cryogenics. Although on second thoughts, they could use anyone who freezes on stage more than twice - a sort of "three strikes and you're in the ice wall" policy. (Return to text)

Not wanting to miss out, our friend Mitch attempts to join Mrs B attaching himself to the Icewall








































(5) If I had paid that sort of money to go in, I would have demanded the right to stay there until I had frozen to death. (Return to text)
Mr B and I getting ready for a visit to the IceBar

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Brilliant! Made me laugh out loud on the train! How embarrassing............

orangeblue said...

The ICE bar...how do they know how long you've been in there? Do you have to wear coloured bands like some swimming pools used to do? Or do you walk round with a parking meter type sticker on your head.

£12 is steep for 45 minutes though, I bet they don't put the heating on either.

Anonymous said...

whoops, that randomclick one was me signed in on my old blogger account for some reason.

BlackLOG said...

I believe they have a special lamp that measure how blue people are. Once you turn a shade known as "45 minutes Blue" - then your time is up and you are out of there....

With the random-click ID I got excited and thought that I had attracted a new victim.

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